Time dilation is wagging the dog instead of the dog wagging its tail.

Spacetime is the framework that explains the behavior of matter; it does not explain the behavior of space or time.

When a clock is sent into space and comes back with a different time on its display, the two options to explain this are as folllows:

1. Time dilated

2. Matter changed its behavior

With Einstein, we find answer #2 as the correct outcome. The clock's matter changed behavior in that different spatial setting, so the time on the display ended up differing.

Children say that time dilated. Einstein says that matter changed.

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If you have a tape measure, would you say that the tape measure was involved with how tall you ended up being in life?

The tape measure is always correct, we know that, so why was it not involved in your height? Because it is a tool, an instrument.

Same with Spacetime, it is an instrument to declare how matter behaves in different spatial settings.